The VENT THREAD (2)

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Ugh. I hate my underconfidance (sp?)

FuckFuckFuckFuck.

Why the hell did I have to do that, especially with those three. Of all people.
I wish I could've just said it right then, it would've made everything just a little better.

UGH.

argh
sick AND horny
*dies*

I skipped all of my classes today. Feel really guilty. Feel like I shouldn't leave the house lest one of my professors sees me, even though I'm allowed to skip once in a while. I hate feeling guilty.

hurt hurt hurt

Why can't the professor e-mail his student when he decides to cancel class.
gosh.

It's nice when a website decides to work properly once in awhile.

I'm upset.
I can't believe I'm upset.
Do you know how long it's been since I've been upset?
No, you don't, because you don't give a fuck.
And of all people, I let YOU make me upset.
You don't give a fuck that I could graduate highschool if I finish this history credit.
All you focus on is the fact that I cannot retain history, and he can.
Yes, he can. He cannot do anything else but be be a self righteous bastard and understand history.
Yet, you dote on him.
And I've spent my whole life in everyone else's shadow.
Always here to help when it's needed, always here to catch those who fall.
I don't mind helping. I really don't. Not even a self-focused bitch like you.
But everyone needs help.
Your my mother, where are you when I need help?
I'm here for you.
Your too busy licking his god damn wounds, helping your flunking kids, and doting on him to notice your semi-normal child who is actually achieving things.
I'm going crazy.
Maybe you'll notice me when I'm a fuck up.
Fuck you.
Fuck.
I'm not crying over this.
FUCK YOU.
FUCK IT.
FUCK.
NO.
Not ME.
I don't cry.
Not. For. This.

hates feeling alone and not happy.

I loved you. I know I did and there's no way I would ever change anything that happened between us. You helped me become who I am, even if I hated you for leaving me. Now I'm glad you did. You made me go through missing someone and wishing they would come back. It gave me something to hope for and someone to try and hold onto. When you came back in April, I was afraid of what might happen. He had just done the same thing to me and I knew I could lose you again just as fast. I'm afraid of falling for anyone or trusting someone as much as I did with you. You'll always have a piece of my heart and I'm pretty sure I'll always count you as my first love. You have no idea how much you meant to me and how I wanted it all to be perfect. I was afraid to tell you I love you not just because of him, but because I knew if I did and if I messed it up, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. Even if you're still not with me and we've grown up, I still miss you. I miss staying on the phone til 4am and waiting to see "Unavailable" flash across the screen. You are the reason I'm me. You were perfect and I wish I had that back.

Enuma Elish

there were new gods created. Apsu thought they were way too loud, so he wanted to try to kill them. However, Ea, the god of wisdom, killed Apsu first then banished his son Mumu. Tiamat, Apsu's wife, was furious and then married Kingu. she then plotted revenge with him. Marduk, the champion of the gods and Ea's son, is chosen to be the champion of the gods against Tiamat's revenge. he ends up chopping Tiamat in half, and her torso becomes the sky. then he kills Kingu, and his blood becomes mankind. then Marduk becomes king.

Utanapishtim is like Noah
Enlil is like God

relate to the biblical story almost exactly><><><!!!!

After you die, you lie in the Realm of the dead covered in feathers and wings eating nothing but dust and mud with a stern goddess watching over all the dead people.

Fuck you Jamie.
You seduce me into having feelings for you, and tell me you're in love with me.
then I find out you were lying the whole fucking time,after I'd already found you a fucking place to live.
Now you say that it's "too much jess" and show me no fucking respect, when i barely ever fucking see you anyway and I don't go out of my way to fucking be around you.
You are such a fucking asshole and I haven't done ANYTHING fucking wrong and you still treat me like shit, and it's people like you which is why I hate myself so much.
And you're a horrible fucking room mate.
Fuck you, i want you out of my house.

Did your feelings change?
If they did, I knew that would happen >.<