well...i've kinda got a problem. i really really want to dye my hair black, and i'm sure i can handle it, but my father thinks otherwise the thing is, he doesn't want me to turn my body into a fashion statement, he doesn't want me to show the world who i am. he thinks i can't handle the prejuidice i'd get, that people will not see me as ''the sweet boy'' he knows i am. that i will be beaten, shouted at, things like that. what i wanna ask is, what is the community's (that's you! *points*) experience with things like this? is my father right? i really wanna show him this so as to convince him that i CAN handle it...so i wanna know what you point of view is on this. and if you too deem me to young.

Well the fact that your an emo should show the world who u r so its a bit l8 for that, isnt it? and hey the other bit where u get shouted at - u dont really, all my friends think me being emo is kwl

thats nice well anyway, my dad seems to think id get shouted at and beaten up. the fact is, alot of people at my school are goth/emo/punker and nothing happens to them. my dad aslo seems to believe that im too young, and will have to much more downsides on this than upsides...i dont think so really ....

telling your dad
that everyone at school is emo or punk or whatever
isn't going to help change his mind
he dosn't care what everyone else is
he's worried about you
i say that you slowly change everything else
like get the all stars
get the tighter jeans
get the striped shirts
get the belts
get the wrist bands
start doing things with your hair
and graduially get into it
this way it won't be a shock to everyone
and they'll stil look at you as being you
and so wil your dad
i wanted to dye my hair black to
i haven't yet
but i slowly getting everything else
and there will be a point
where the only thing left is to dye my hair
like when people are walking with me to class
and some guy yells "emo" at me
my friends usually look around and try and find one
(that only happened once but still haha)
it's halarious cuz no one really notices when you're doing it gradually

Gonna do this reply in dutch, since Shadow also is dutch. Srry for the non-dutch people..

Sinds mijn 14e loop ik al rond in alto/skate/scene kleding en heb ik lang haar gehad (die van zichzelf al donker is), dat ik op het moment eventjes kort heb maar weer terug aan het laten groeien ben. Ik heb een piercing door mijn lip en loop met een tas vol patches en buttons.

Ondertussen ben ik 20 en loop ik er nogsteeds zo bij. In deze 6 jaar tijd ben ik nooit, maar dan ook echt nooit in elkaar geslagen of ernstig uitgescholden of wat dan ook. Natuurlijk waren er zo nu en dan wat mensen die hun mond niet dicht konden houden en toch wat riepen, maar meer ook niet.

Ik denk dat de maatschappij waar we nu in zitten hier in Nederland toch wel subculturen heeft leren accepteren.

Nu ik dit zo aan het typen ben komt er wel iets in me op, namelijk; ik heb in de loop der tijd wel gemerkt dat het afhankelijk is van in welke stad/dorp/wijk je rondloopt dat mensen je mogen ja of nee. Zelf woon ik in Nijmegen, waar over het algemeen best veel van die gangstah wannabe's zitten. Zelfs daar heb ik nergens last van.

Nu kom ik wel eens in een dorpje van een vriend van me. En daar blijken mensen echt een hekel te hebben aan skaters. Ik kom er best vaak, en dan loop of rijd ik daar met mijn skateboard en dan zie je wel dat mensen je link aankijken, maar ze hebben nog nooit iets gezegt.

Ik hoop dat je met dit verhaal je vader een beetje gerust kan stellen, ouders zijn moeilijk over te halen ik weet het, mijn vader vind mijn 'stijl' ook niet echt fantastisch maar hij heeft het leren accepteren.

- Soulburn

It's not a fashion statement, It's a deathwish.

thanks for all the help ppl!

@valsiraj:
im doing it i got the allstars, im going to get a haircut tomorrow, and im listening the music....my dad has agreed on me to change my hair btw not dye it, just get a cut, but im still happy

@soulburn:(in dutch )
helemaal gelijk veel mesen zijn bij ons op school idd ook zo ''altenatief'' enzo...maar ik denk dat ik zowieso nog even ermee wacht, ik heb een paar dagen geleden slaande ruzie erover gehad met mijn vader, dus ik laat het gewoon ev en bezinken denk ik
@xenomorph: shut up man. this is for serious descussions. seriously

ok #1. i think you would look mad hot with balck hair and #2. im not sure about your school, but atleast at mine the emos arnt beaten or made fun of really at all- just ignored..so i would go for it and #3. i didnt ask before i dyed my hair black, i just went for it and yea the rents were kinda pissed..but it was 2 late for them to tell me not to!
<3

As long as you show ure dad how serious you are about this as well as how responsible you are, he may eventualy agree.

Luckilly, I have never had that problem. I'm Hispanic. My hair is naturally black.

xxAmieexox33 wrote: ok #1. i think you would look mad hot with balck hair and #2. im not sure about your school, but atleast at mine the emos arnt beaten or made fun of really at all- just ignored..so i would go for it and #3. i didnt ask before i dyed my hair black, i just went for it and yea the rents were kinda pissed..but it was 2 late for them to tell me not to!
<3

technically they could have made you dye it back.


anywho your not too young ive had my hair many different colors..
ive been dyeing my hair since 7th grade and seriously ive forgotton my natural hair color O.O
haha oh well maybe ill find it one day hahahaha
my mom says its blonde...my dad says its brown...who know what the hell my reall hair color is...!!! hahaha

so i say dye away!
and just make accurate points that arnt whiny when your trying to explain why you want to do it.
say your expressing yourself.
explain that people arnt going to beat you up.
you know have a mature conversation making valid points and disscuss things like an adult.
compromise is the key!

of course you will get stereotyped but that will happen no matter what you look like. i think your dad is just trying to protect you, just keep talking to him and he might give in.

To be honest, I used to be blonde, But Now I have darkish hair...
I think If you want to do it, You should be able to handle the consequences, and just cause your dad thinks you can't, dosent mean he's right.
I say try to convince him, If he still says no, I dunno what to tell you, But I had to pick at my mom for about 4 months before I could get her to let me do it.

Shadow wrote: well...i've kinda got a problem. i really really want to dye my hair black, and i'm sure i can handle it, but my father thinks otherwise the thing is, he doesn't want me to turn my body into a fashion statement, he doesn't want me to show the world who i am. he thinks i can't handle the prejuidice i'd get, that people will not see me as ''the sweet boy'' he knows i am. that i will be beaten, shouted at, things like that. what i wanna ask is, what is the community's (that's you! *points*) experience with things like this? is my father right? i really wanna show him this so as to convince him that i CAN handle it...so i wanna know what you point of view is on this. and if you too deem me to young.

Be glad that your parents care enough about you to not want you to be embarrassed of yourself later in life. Be glad that your parents care enough about you to not want to you embarrass yourself with a silly trend. Stick with natural colors.