Can't cook? THE EB COOKBOOK FOR IDIOTS

Potato Scones


And for a sweeter dish
Patty Cakes

I would personally add 1 teaspoon of vanilla over half a teaspoon.

And to ice the patty cakes,
vanilla butter icing

Also, just use a knife to fold in about 2/3 drops of food colouring to add some colour to the icing.

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Milkshakes

=


Milk
Ice cream
Anything else you can think of (ie, coffee if you want coffee milk shake, banana if you want a banana milk shake [which is my personal favorite to make], etc etc)

Easiest and yummiest thing ever.

Measurements? idk, I just throw in whatever looks right XD

Isnt it easier taking cooking clases??? lol

Onion Rings

Beer battered:


Deep Fried Onion Rings


Oven Baked Onion Rings

venus will you cook for me :3????

And i have one

Classic Veg Stir Fry (Nom Nom Nom)

Ingredients

1 tbsp groundnut oil
1 onion, peeled and sliced
1 clove garlic, crushed
1 red pepper, sliced
1 yellow pepper, sliced
100g/4oz broccoli florets
175g/6oz baby sweetcorn, halved
2 courgettes, sliced
50g/2oz water chestnuts, sliced
2 tbsp light soy sauce
1 tsp arrowroot, mixed with
2 tbsp light vegetable stock
5cm/2in piece fresh root ginger, grated and juice squeezed out
1 tbsp sweet chilli sauce
50g/2oz cashew nuts, lightly toasted
Method

1. Heat the oil in a wok and fry the onion and garlic for 3 minutes. Add the peppers and fry for 3 minutes more.
2. Add the broccoli florets, sweetcorn and courgettes and continue to fry for a further 5 minutes. Add the water chestnuts and toss to mix in.
3. In a small bowl, mix together the soy sauce, arrowroot and light stock, ginger juice and sweet chilli sauce.
4. Using a wooden spoon, make a space in the centre of the stir fried vegetables so that the base of the wok is visible. Pour in the sauce and bring to the boil, stirring all the time until it starts to thicken. Toss the vegetables to coat thoroughly with the sauce.
5. Transfer to a serving dish and sprinkle with the cashew nuts.

SugarCoatedSuicide wrote: venus will you cook for me :3????

Yes I will m'dear

A simple Spaghetti sauce:

A can of tomato sauce (NOT PASTE, NOT JUICE, sauce.)
A little store bought italian seasoning(to taste,it'sreally all very simple) (You can find this in pretty much any grocery store. Right by the salt and pepper and gravy mixes)
Sugar to taste
And steamed(or skilliet cooked, if you don't mind grease) hamburger if you like.
You have to let it sit for about an hour, and it will thicken into Red sauce.

SIMPLE DESERT:
Tiny fried udon noodles
mixed with your
favorite kind of chocolate chip. Butterscotch or any other kind.
It's fucking delicious, and really simple.

French Onion Soup
(excellent cold-weather soup.)

Four cups of sliced onions
4 cans of beef broth
2 tbsp Extra Virgin Olive Oil
1/4 cup unsalted butter (optional, but i add it because I need to make sure I take in so many calories. If you omit the butter, add a little more EVOO)
A splash of cooking sherry, if you have access (and permission)
1 tsp dried thyme
salt and pepper to taste
slices of french bread (optional)
slices of provolone (optional)

Put the EVOO in a skillet, along with the butter (if you are using it). Add the onions and cook them on low until they are translucent. (Do NOT brown them.) Put in a pot with the broth, thyme, and sherry. Season with slat and pepper and simmer for half an hour. Ladel into bowels, and place cheese on top if you desire. If you would like the cheese to melt faster, throw the bowl on a cookie sheet into the oven (or broiler) with the cheese on top until cheese melts. Good stuff, pretty simple to make.

if you like eggs there's egg-salad.

Hard boil eight eggs or however many you want, for about 15-20 min.
rinse under cold water. Peel. Stick in a bowl and mash. Season with whatever you like.
[Mayo is suggested or else the eggs might be a little dry]. Voila. Eat with bread, crackers, etc.
Whatever you like.


There's always the salad alternative.
I always like to whip up a delicious salad when there's not much around.

For dressing:

Vinegar or lemon/lime juice. [pour as much as you want dressing]
put olive oil. [just enough to put a thin rim around the vinegar or lemon/lime juice].
Add sugar/honey, pepper, salt, italian seasonings. Whatever pleases your taste buds.
Onions, bell peppers, olives, etc.
Mix well.
Put washed salad leaves in.
For optionality add in soy sauce pan fried chicken to the salad.

If you don't like that either:

There's A hearty german meal that will take a little while to make.
[for one person!]

Flatten a slab of chicken breast with a meat pounder or cutting board.
Crack an egg or two onto a plate. Put a cup of flour on another plate. And
bread crumbs on a third.
Slather the chicken in the egg goo, then with the flour and then make the bread crumbs stick as a last.
[Fry with a little veggie oil in the pan].



Boil potatoes like you would mash potatoes.
Cool them with cold water. Cut into slices.
Now pop them into a well buttery greasy pan and fry till golden brown.

Voila. And you can eat a salad or sauer kraut with that... depending on what you like.
Though make sure to time your potatoes and the chicken breast well. :]
[I suggest boiling the potatoes and once they're cut leave them to rest and work on the meat. Once the meat is just fresh popped into the pan you can start frying the potatoes].

Hope those aren't too difficult!
:]

Obscurity wrote: if you like eggs there's egg-salad.

Hard boil eight eggs or however many you want, for about 15-20 min.
rinse under cold water. Peel. Stick in a bowl and mash. Season with whatever you like.
[Mayo is suggested or else the eggs might be a little dry]. Voila. Eat with bread, crackers, etc.
Whatever you like.
:]

I always made egg salad with Miracle whip and Mustard.
Your version sounds awesome.

Sizzlers Cheesy Toast

thank you to everyone who has posted <33
i will copy and paste to a file ^^ i cannot even cook rice, so this is helpful for me when moving out next year -saving my life from fast food=grateful, loves- <3

i have no recipe to offer m(__)m

This is all I really eat:

[img]http://pics.livejournal.com/requiem4unicorn/pic/0000pg3r/s320x240[/img]

Two teaspoons of becel light so that it doesn't stick to the pan.
That's 35 calories. And 4g of fat
And one and a half green peppers.
Another 22.5 calories. 0.15g of fat. And just over 5.5g of carbohydrates. About 1.3g of protien.

I fry them so that they're warm, but still crunchy.

Preparation time: Less than 15 minutes.