Where there is air,
I breath it.
Where there is insanity,
I drink of its cup.
Where there is pain,
I experience it.
Where there is love,
I search for its purity.
Where there is death,
I revel in it.
Where there is life,
I feel numb.
poems by xxlovexkillxbitchesxx
14 posts • Page 1 of 1 •
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
why do I still care?
You said that you loved me,
and I didn't care what people said.
Now I know it's just a lie,
a trick to get inside my head.
And now you're just laughing,
i know this isn't fair.
You ripped my heart to shreds,
so why do I still care?
and I didn't care what people said.
Now I know it's just a lie,
a trick to get inside my head.
And now you're just laughing,
i know this isn't fair.
You ripped my heart to shreds,
so why do I still care?
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
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Rella - From Heaven to your heart.
- Posts: 8179
- Joined: 21 Dec 2008
- Age: 100
- Location: Interplanetary Bad Vibe Zone
Rella wrote: Hmmmm.
Could you add a little more to that please? im not sure if thats good or bad, or what i need to make it better.
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
RE: poems by xxlovexkillxbitchesxx
I think she was just wondering where the poetry started...
It's ok, i don't see it ether.
It's ok, i don't see it ether.
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LostInTransition - Fresh Meat
- Posts: 27
- Joined: 21 Jun 2008
- Age: 16
- Gender: Male
I'm sorry for the pain I cost,
I'm sorry for the love we've lost.
It's my fault that you're mad at me,
and I keep blaming it on everything.
I'm the one that makes you cry,
I'm the reason for the tears at night.
I try to make it good again,
so we can be in love until the end.
But I mess it up everytime,
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for the love we've lost.
It's my fault that you're mad at me,
and I keep blaming it on everything.
I'm the one that makes you cry,
I'm the reason for the tears at night.
I try to make it good again,
so we can be in love until the end.
But I mess it up everytime,
I'm sorry.
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
I am your lover,
or nothing at all.
We were best friends,
and you let us fall.
All those times we had are lost,
all the memories are gone.
I am your friend and lover altogether,
now it's nothing... at all.
or nothing at all.
We were best friends,
and you let us fall.
All those times we had are lost,
all the memories are gone.
I am your friend and lover altogether,
now it's nothing... at all.
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
You are my hero,
true friend indeed.
You are there,
when I am in need.
and pretty blonde hair,
your beautiful smile.
Makes me want to run a mile.
I will do what you want me to do.
Because you're there for me,
so I'm there for you.
I wrote this a REALLY long time ago. so don't hate this one please?
true friend indeed.
You are there,
when I am in need.
and pretty blonde hair,
your beautiful smile.
Makes me want to run a mile.
I will do what you want me to do.
Because you're there for me,
so I'm there for you.
I wrote this a REALLY long time ago. so don't hate this one please?
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
They're good, over all I like =)xxlovexkillxbitchesxx wrote:Rella wrote: Hmmmm.
Could you add a little more to that please? im not sure if thats good or bad, or what i need to make it better.
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Rella - From Heaven to your heart.
- Posts: 8179
- Joined: 21 Dec 2008
- Age: 100
- Location: Interplanetary Bad Vibe Zone
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xxlovexkillxbitchesxx - Almost Emo
- Posts: 65
- Joined: 23 Jun 2009
- Age: 99
- Gender: Female
RE: poems by xxlovexkillxbitchesxx
Good use of brevity but nothing stuck out to me. I liked the voice of the speaker but other than that this poem was a bore. In fact, all of the poems read the same. The same sing-song rhyme scheme and the same theme of lost love (with the exception of the first and last poem). I would suggest you work on the imagery in order to make the lines pop more (in all of the pieces, including the first and last ones). Try to show more (i.e. tell a story through your poetry) rather than tell, (i.e., ranting about how your life sucks.)
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Takato - Almost Emo
- Posts: 61
- Joined: 17 May 2009
- Age: 20
RE: poems by xxlovexkillxbitchesxx
nothing rlly jumped out to me either
but i like the idea and writting in the first one
but i like the idea and writting in the first one
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MelodyOfMalice - Je récidive, tu persévères.
- Posts: 4485
- Joined: 16 Feb 2009
- Age: 99
- Location: Between An Erupting Earth And An Exploding Sky
14 posts • Page 1 of 1 •