poems by XtorchicX

First Kiss

He watches her constantly, day and night
He hides in the shadows, avoiding the light
He wants to catch her any way he can
Because for once in his life he begins to feel human
He waits for her unwearyingly behind her door
She will soon be his, human no more
He listens as her heartbeat sings a euphonic tune
He could dance to this beat under the midnight moon
He comes out; she stands, frozen in fear
He strokes her neck and kisses her ear
She doesn’t know what to do, what to say
She wants him to stop, but he continues anyway
He kisses her, softly at first, then vicious
He pierces her lip, his feelings turn malicious
His hands run wildly through her hair
No feeling in the world to this could compare
His kisses drag down to the end of her neck
The warmth of her neck makes his tongue begin to lick
Fangs in her neck, blood racing from the clock,
His mouth and her neck are now in a lock
He drinks too much and she falls to the floor
Her blood flowing inside him, screaming for more
His ear to her heart, silent—he stood in horror
This heart that he loves no longer beats for her
He tried everything to bring her back
Nothing worked, her soul was black
And for the rest of his being, he never loved another one
For his mind screamed rapidly, "What have I done?"


A Girl, a Boy, a Misused Toy

Once upon a time,
A girl met a boy.
He didn’t think much of it.
She’d be his little toy.
The girl thought differently,
She thought he had potential.
He’d meet her folks, take her to prom,
Never thought he’d be detrimental.
The first date was good,
The second one was better,
But then came the third,
And he handed her a letter.
She opened it under the table,
On her knee, she laid it down.
It said, Come to my house tonight,
My folks are out of town.
She looked up suspiciously.
Did he think she was that easy?
But he said, “No, no! Not like that!
I know you’re not that sleazy!”
Relieved, she sighed and agreed,
And they went off in his car.
But things didn’t seem right…
They were going very far.
Suddenly, the girl didn’t recognize,
Anything at all.
She asked where exactly he lived,
He replied it was next to the mall.
But they passed the mall ages ago…
Something wasn’t right.
Though scared, she pulled up all the courage she had,
And said with all her might,
“Now listen here, boy, you take me home.
You’re really scaring me!”
To which he laughed and replied,
“I’ll never set you free.”
The girl sat and listened carefully,
To the quick thump thump of her heart.
This was it, she thought, I can’t believe it.
She desperately needed to dart.
She grabbed for her phone, and opened her door,
But it was already too late.
They had arrived at a run-down home,
Reached the final portion of their date.
He grabbed her arms, and held them tight,
Said, “I’m never letting go.”
The tears leaked out, it couldn’t end like this.
She couldn’t let it--no!
But he was stronger, faster, smarter,
And soon she was in the bed.
Resisting still, she couldn’t escape,
By the end of the night, she was dead.
Lying, soaked in blood, on the cold, stone floor,
And with one last kick from the boy,
It proved the boy was sick criminal.


Abusive

As poor Lisa hides under her bed,
She can hear her father’s footsteps into her room,
He grabs poor Lisa from under there by her head,
And she knows this is her doom
To face this everyday what a shame,
And as he strikes her with his hand,
He says shes the one to blame,
And she falls to the ground quicker than sand.
She kicks and screams for her life,
And she still doesnt know why she deserves this punishment,
And when he pulls out the knife,
she knows shes dead and her life wasnt well spent.
He strikes at her but she runs away,
And goes right after her with anger in his face,
He screams at her to stay,
And says she has no other place,
He catches her and takes the knife to her throat,
And she knows this is the end of this nightmare,
He cut her and blood splattered all over her coat,
And now her face was in a straight stare.



Child Abuse

My name is sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm sradishing to cry.
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I sradish to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Murdered me.


Dying Inside

I sit by the window staring outside,
sitting there wondering,
why do I cry,
tears run down my face,
they drip down my cheek,
I've been crying so much,
I can barely evenspeak,
The world has left me,
behind all alone,
I can never forget,
the words that you spoke,
so many years ago,
I tried to forget,
I tried to move on,
but my world came crashing down,
no matter what I did,
depression thentook me,
into this black abyss,
where I sit in the darkness,
starring outside,
wondering why,
why do I cry,
Now I know the answer,
but still it's no use,
this endless flow of tears,
will always continue.


Scene

scene?
Is it really that bad?

You can't accept the fact
That I get a little sad?

That I'm a little mad?
So I favor black,
And I don't like pink.

You use those as reasons
To make my soul sink.
So some of us cut,
And some of us don't.

We can smile.
Laugh love and live.
We're just not like the rest.

Sure we cry,
But none of you understand.

It's not like we had planned
To live life like this.
To spend our days
Depressed and amiss.


We're not bad people.
We don't worship Satan,
We're not out to kill anyone.

We just don't like the world
As much as everyone else.
And we love ourselves
As much as we could.

But we're okay with that.
You can call us ugly,
You can call us fat.

But you can't change who we are.

We are scene.
What's so wrong with that?



Gave up Myself; wasted myself

"Did you get what you deserve?"
A line I reserved
for this ironic movement made just for you
I made myself the karma that stabbed you
I stand here now to watch you fall
and to see you painfully loose it all

It reminds me of a time when
something like this was happenin':
you herded us like sheep to the ledge
one final shove pushed us over the edge

And like the story of every great savior
I came back stronger, even braver
I dragged you to that same old ledge
I dropped you over that same sharp edge

One last look into the dark depth
I held my breath
and took hold of my last ounce of bravery
Revenge made me my biggest enemy

I made myself go right over the side too
I can't believe i gave up myself for you.


I can’t help but wonder

Sometimes I stop and think, about moments we used to share.
Sadness fills my heart, my spirit, with despair.
Sorry for all the times, I didn't listen.
Sorry for all the mistakes I made, showing our relationship, wide open.
I stop and stare, I freeze and stand.
I just can't help the way I am.
I have the need to be out spoken, and be the one out from the crowd.
I stand under the pitch black sky, and take the time to think, why I had started, to try and shrink.
I might not be as smart as you, or emotionally, as deep.
It's hard for me to think about you and then try to sleep.
My love is emotionally taking over my life.
I can't help but wonder if you're still on my side.


Ladies and gentlemen!
For Casey Quay; the Thrasher joker.

Ladies and Gentlemen
Welcome to the show!
Why don’t you take a front row seat?
And enjoy the entertainment

Tonight, we have a world-class performance
From the one and only
His tricks will keep you bedazzled for hours
That, I can guarantee

Because along time ago
I used to be just like you
Completely amazed, caught in a daze
By every act and stunt

But it wasn’t believable for long
Eventually, I saw the monster behind the mask
And you will soon see for yourself
Him carrying out his evil task

But after the show
I encourage you, please
Applaud this jack of all trades
This master of tricks
For his truly, exceptional performance


Needles don’t have love

Love blinded me in ways I never thought possible
This euphoric feeling you gave me
kept my heart entangled
I couldn't love anyone but you
Simply because you didn't want me to
This needle excites me everyday.
Listening to your entrancing words,
I drifted deeper into this ecstasy
All the love you gave me
crept into my veins
This drug caresses me
But who was I to know,
that you kept me in elegant chains?
Yes, you say you didn't mean to
you say you didn't try to
but you stole my heart
my mind
my grace
and frankly,
I feel too confined.
This needle is too much for me.
We've broken up so many times
but I always came back for a higher dose
thinking everthing will get better
but forgive me for being a fool
And even though this will hurt
Believe me, it won't be so bad
Just turn into an adorable flirt
And you might find a better me
One with stronger veins
to inject the drug you call "love"
This drug destroys me.
One last fix (I love you)
and I'm done.
You may think that compared to the rest
I was the best
the best girlfriend you ever had
But how can that be true,
when you haven't put it to the test?
Just take back this needle you gave me.
It's better to tell you the truth now
and I already know it's painful
but I can't take this anymore
No more addiction
No more withdrawals
No more injections
No more love
It's time we both let go
because I can no longer
see myself with you forever
I'm putting the needle aside.
Save the good memories
and the good feelings
but it's time we let this pass
My heart is no longer yours for the keeping
Let me go
Place the images on a shelf
But please remember...
you can't love someone
if you never loved yourself
I'm giving up
I'm throwing this needle away
No longer will I need...
a dose of you a day


Night to day

A whisper in the night,
An echo in the wind
The sky darkens,
As day comes to an end
The bright moon looms,
The grey clouds hover
Rain hails,
People run for cover
Cold spreads,
Street lights awaken
The trees dance,
Sodden and shaken
The harsh wind sways,
The hard rain falls
Children hurry home,
For them, their parents call
A silence in the night,
A silence in the wind
The sky lightens,
As a new day begins



Nightmare

Consumed by doubt,
Suffocated by fear
Pushing you away,
Yet wishing you were here
Embraced by regret,
Pierced through with hate
Prolonging this nightmare,
Though I'm in a waking state
Sadness surrounds,
Keep trying to break away
Your heart starts to fall,
And it shatters like hardened clay
Will the pain sustain?
Falling, burning like acid rain
Where will your running lead?
Only where the monsters will laugh while you bleed
Death keeps close,
Amused by worthless attempt
Your effort will never falter,
As well as your contempt


She was only thirteen
In loving memory of Alice Rocha

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly crys
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"Please God, why is
My life always sinking?"
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
And the poor child was beaten
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless piece of TRASH!
The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
Then quickly barged in
Everything quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the little girl
Lying dead on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms.

The best friends guide to suicide
~In companionate, loving memory of James buddle~

They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Did they think that it was easy,
To see you tear apart
The things that made you love me,
That is that bind our hearts?
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Did they think I didn’t try?
Didn’t they somehow realize
Without the light of your eyes,
A part of me would die?
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
A part of me is bleeding,
A part me still cries,
I guess you were succeeding,
When you made me say goodbye?
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
I thought I understood you,
Thought the words you said were true.
Did you know that you would break me
When you did what you had to do?
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Did it matter to you at all
That you’d leave me behind?
You left me to take the fall,
Did you think love would make me blind?
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Love has left me broken,
Love has left me deaf,
It’s left a lot of words unspoken,
Because you thought it would be best.
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Because I couldn't make things right,
I'll have to live with these regrets.
I was not enough to save your life,
I’ll always remember though I’ll try to forget.
They say I am a coward,
They say I could have stopped you,
They say I had the power,
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Did you know you killed me with secrets?
Did you know you didn’t just kill yourself?
Did you know, each night, I wake up inthese sweats,
Did you want to ask me anything else?
You say I am a coward,
You say I could have stopped you,
You say I had the power,
Did you think I didn’t want you?
I’ll miss you for forever,
I’ll always wonder why,
I’ll wonder why you didn’t tell me,
I’ll wonder if you tried.
I’ll wonder why I wasn’t enough
To anchor you when things got rough.
I’ll wonder if I’ll ever forget
All these deeply buried regrets.
I’ll wonder when all the memories
Will fade to simply bittersweet.
I’ll never get to ask you
Never find out your truth,
Why you gave to me the pain.
Though they say I am a coward
I think that you were worse.
They say I could have stopped you,
But you left us all to hurt.
They say I had the power,
That's what they whisper at the church.
Did they think I didn’t want you?
Did they think I could feel worse?
I’ll miss the boy I thought you were,
I’ll miss the colour of your eyes.
I’ll miss the love I thought was sure,
And every single night I’ll cry.

The day you died
In dear memory of hosan Chazza

As I sit here against this tree
where we used to play and laugh
where we shined and blossomed
where we fell, and picked back up
to where we were before
to run faster
to better places
to get past the flames
of the holdings back of life itself
we laughed at the funny mistakes we both made
without hurting
where we raised and chased the dreams that we so long searched for
the tree showed us the way
to always come back home
to see what our day was
to see how our morning was
to see each other
together
to talk about anything
anything in the world...
there was never a reason to fight
so we never did
there was never a reason to yell
so we always talked calmly
even if we had to cry,
we could cry, on their shoulder
knowing they are always there for us
knowing that someday we can pick them up too
loving, sharing, and caring with all of our hearts
never giving up
until that one day...
I know you could not do anything
but neither could I...
and I felt like everything I had done, and believed in
was never true
that day...
the day I sat in the chair...
waiting...
knowing you would come back...
as the man came up to me,


Truly yours

To think that I have someone like you
To think I know you care
To think I’ll do anything for
To think I would go anywhere
I know that you've been hurt
I know you been let down
But Ill care for you for
as long as you will let me
I can’t stop thinking of you
I love I know your name
I love that I have met you
And I pray you do the same
Dreams come true I guess some times
All I dream of is you
I can’t help but to need you
I know you want me to
I want I to hold onto you
Until the end of time
i want to hold onto you
Cause I know you’re mine
Ill sell all that I own right now
Just to be with you
To spend eternal night with you
Something I need to do
Say my name with tenderness
Say it cause you care
Say it cause you are the one that is my everywhere
I wish that you could be with me
I wish you could be here
I just want to see your face
and smell your lovely hair
So when the time does come along
I’ll be at your side
Ill hug you and Ill kiss you doll
Cause you're forever mine.


You love me, don’t you?
I think that’s pretty clear
When you hold my hand, kiss me,
Or whisper in my ear…

I love you, don’t I?

Because you’re always in my thoughts,
I get butterflies that flutter,
My stomach in knots.
You can’t stop thinking about me, can you?
I see the way you stare!
Goodness, you’re adorable!
Just like this love affair!
I can’t stop thinking about you, can I?
I think I’ve gone mad!
Because when you’re gone, guess what?
I get terribly sad!
Did you notice that…
When it rains, we don’t notice we’re wet?
Because ever since
That fateful day we met,
The only thing we saw was each other.
People called us fools in love,
But I think they’re just bitter!
Did you notice that…
We laugh at everything we see?
I guess it’s because we’re bonkers!
To us, the lot of the world is funny!
Did you notice me notice...
That you were looking at me?
Because when I noticed you noticed
I figured there’s no where else I’d rather be...
So here we are, trapped in this moment.
Me and you - spellbound in time.
With love so sugary and astounding,
And all-around sublime.
So everyone can be jealous!
All those bachelorettes and bachelors.
We’ll ignore their negativity, for
Only our love really matters!


Your bloody lies
For Matthew flanagan and for all the hell he put me though

Your lies cut and they hurt.
They fooled and mislead
Because of your lies I am still bleeding
While in my mind im still pleading
For what you said to be true
For what you promised me, that you will still follow through
Its because of your lies that I am Dead
Inside and out
Because of your lies you caused me so much anguish and sorrow
But in the end your fallacies were gone by tomorrow
You told me you would never let me go
You told me that I had that special glow
You told me you loved me, that you cared and were infatuated
With you mesmerizing words I became saturated
You told me things would get better
You even wrote me many a love letter
But you lied and in the end you left
You were gone without a care
Unnoticing that I was still bleeding from the wound in which you tore out my heart
Its still beating for you for your made up dreams
While inside the rest of me everything is full of hate filled screams
Every drop of blood I spill is one for you, one for you malevolence
With each cut I am closer to death and farther from you
Inside of me I think I hate you
But there is still that small shred of hope that you will return and that it will all be true
While in reality I know that it will never be that we are forever through
You lies weren’t like that of the average persons made up contortions
Yours were almost true, the seemed so real so tangible
But in the end the were fake, vile, and decieaving
Your evil and misleading
I wish for the day when I can truly say I hate you
But that day I fear will not come
For when you ripped my still beating heart from my chest
It still had emotions for you unlike the rest
So to this day, this very day my heart is still beating
Forever remaining, forever needing
Forever Pleading



hope you guys like these. there is a lot i know. lol. but leave your input i would love to see them. ^_^

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wow those were deep but one question.....where did you learn to write like that? it's amazing

lostfallling wrote: wow those were deep but one question.....where did you learn to write like that? it's amazing

thanks. i guess its out of experance and bord weekends i guess. thanks. i really apreciate it ^^.