I PROMISED MYSELF

I feel downright horrible right now. Starting off with things, I'm depressed. Not this teen "aw man the cafeteria didn't serve corndogs today" depressed. It's more like the, 'I wish I at least had the motivation to see a psychologist' depressed. I'm sure many of you know how this feels. But it's not the reason I'm even more upset.

I bought my first pack of cigs today. Yea I've smoked twice before, and didn't see anything special at all, and honestly I still dont. And maybe some of you are thinking, "its just cigarettes, people smoke, whatever". But this was a promise I made to myself my entire life never to do, but there was nothing left for me to do tonight after seeing my ex gf(of one month) and roomate(who i sleep 10 ft away from) together, making out in her car. It was the only thing to make me feel like I shouldnt walk across the highway onto incoming traffic. I don't want to become addicted, but I don't have any idea how to get my life on track again.

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First off you should really talk to someone
Clinical depression can be greatly helped through many methods

I understand that you made a promise to yourself to never smoke
But so did I as a child
But you grow up, and some things don't seem as important anymore, and other things becuase much more important
In my opinion, if smoking is calming you down and helping you relax it's much better than almost any alternative

To make it easier to break the promise you made to yourself perhaps compromise, say only smoke for a predetermined amount of time, of until a certain situation ends

I've been diagnosed with clinical depression aswell, and chances are I wouldn't be here right now if I didn't go an see someone all those years ago
I reccomend taking small steps in the right direction, that would be seeing someone, and dealing with internal issues

xsecret9x wrote: there was nothing left for me to do tonight after seeing my ex gf(of one month) and roomate(who i sleep 10 ft away from) together, making out in her car.

MOVE!
get out of there

when a break is made, it needs to be clean, or else it will fester

^ also good advice
Maybe remove your roommates testicles too
Bro's before hoe's, man

LOOKS LIKE YOU BROKE YOUR PROMISE

BrawnyMan wrote: LOOKS LIKE YOU BROKE YOUR PROMISE

GAH
CAN'T

STOP

LAUGHING

Thank you to the man with an avatar of Christian Bale(FTL). Its people like you who make others not want to post their problems for help.
I wish i could move out but it's college and my other two roomates have been my friends since high school. Besides, why should i have to move out instead of him? If bros before hos was in place, he would never have done this to me, but his excuse was, "I didnt know about this." ha, right.
But a true thank you to you Metal, knowing someone else was in a similar state and is doing alright helps a lot, so i'll try what you've said, small steps

Total role reversal in this thread
I'm usually the one being an asshole
I guess your story was just something similar to what I've been through
But yes, I'm fine now
And smoking isn't as hard to quit as you might think if you've only been smoking for >a year

Do what you need to do to get by, and maybe talk to your roommate
Tell him what he's doing is fucking with you
And if he takes if badly, maybe you're college will shift around roommates in certain situations, I'm sure this would be one of them
But I hope it dosen't come to that